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Devastated man asks about connotation of massage Print E-mail
Written by Amy Alkon   
Thursday, 05 November 2009 00:19

I kept seeing this woman I was interested in at pool parties, but I've always been very shy and reluctant to make the first move. At the third party, she hugged me as she was leaving. The following week, she kissed me. I invited her to come up for dinner. We had a great time. I even kissed her, and she didn't resist. Several days later, she said she'd see me at my condo's pool that afternoon, but never showed or called. Midweek, I texted her, inviting her over for "drinks, soft music, and a nice relaxing massage to ease the stress of the work week." No response. Amy, I just meant a back rub, clothes on, like I once gave a female friend. I've never thought of a massage as having sexual connotations. Do you think she inferred that from my offer of a "stress reliever," and is that where I went wrong?Devastated

 
Wise Up (11-02-09) Print E-mail
Written by David Bruce   
Monday, 02 November 2009 12:49

Scientists

• Remember to vote.

• When Jonas Salk, working with many other scientists, developed a vaccine for polio, they first tested it on animals. It then needed to be tested on human beings, including children, who were the most likely to contract the disease. Of course, children can be very afraid of getting a shot, and some of the children participating in the study started crying. William Kirkpatrick, who worked at the D.T. Watson Home near Pittsburgh, a home for children with disabilities, volunteered to get the first shot of vaccine so that he could show the children that getting the shot did not hurt. On July 2, 1952, he became the very first person to be inoculated with the polio vaccine developed by Dr. Salk and others.

By the way, Dr. Salk did not want the vaccine to be named after him. He thought that a better name would be the Pitt vaccine because he had started working on the vaccine at the University of Pittsburgh Medical School. Of course, people were grateful that a vaccine to stop the deadly disease polio had been developed. A merchant in Hohokus, New Jersey, painted the words “THANK YOU, Dr. Salk” on his shop window. Teachers had their young students write thank-you letters to Dr. Salk. (Actually, the fame that came to Dr. Salk was a bit much. When he became engaged to Françoise Gilot, the media annoyed them. To protect their privacy, they announced that they would be married on a certain day, but they actually got married the day before the announced date.) Albert Sabin later developed another polio vaccine that supplanted the Salk vaccine. Humanity is deeply grateful to both men.

Last Updated on Monday, 02 November 2009 12:57
 
Ugly Ducklings Try Too Hard to Keep the Guys Print E-mail
Written by Harlan Cohen   
Monday, 02 November 2009 12:45

Dear Harlan: I am a freshman girl in high school. I always thought I would be one of those girls who all through high school would not have a boyfriend and never get a date. Now, less than two months into the school year, I am dating a junior whom I really like. We have many of the same interests and have pretty much the same friends. And that's a problem. One of our friends, who is a senior, all of a sudden likes this guy, too. I am majorly upset about this, mainly because the other girl's crush came out of nowhere. It's really nobody's business who I date. But I'm tired of looking like the bad guy when I didn't do anything. What do you think of this? — Not Feeling Like Juliet

Last Updated on Monday, 02 November 2009 12:52
 
The hills are alive with not-so-cute cartoon animals Print E-mail
Written by Dennis E. Powell   
Monday, 02 November 2009 10:06

Disney it ain’t.

I think you know what I mean: all those lovely Walt Disney cartoon movies, in which the birds flutter lovingly around the sky, and the fawns gambol in the meadows, the butterflies flit about like ballerinas, and the ever-so-cute bunnies and squirrels and chipmunks scurry — the word probably was invented to describe cartoon rodents and lagomorphs — nearby.

 
Ask the Advice Goddess (10-29-09) Print E-mail
Written by Amy Alkon   
Thursday, 29 October 2009 09:55

I'm 39, and married four years to a woman I dated for two. She's the mother of my two stepchildren, 13 and 16. The problem is, I may be in love with a girl from high school, the most beautiful woman I've ever seen. I've always felt she was the one I was meant to be with. She was popular, and, well, I was not. Still, I can't honestly say that if I'd asked her out, she'd have said no. I wrote her love letters and sent roses on her birthday, which she called to thank me for. Over the years, I haven't stopped thinking about her, and dream about her frequently. At my high school reunion, I heard she's single. She's my Facebook friend, and I wanted to say hi, but she's never on. Yesterday, my dream about her was so emotional that I nearly woke up in tears. I love my wife, but she's more like my best friend. Should I let this affect my marriage? Could I, should I, pursue the woman of my dreams?Pining

 
Wise Up (10-26-09) Print E-mail
Written by David Bruce   
Monday, 26 October 2009 09:39

Free Speech

• Paul Zindel’s books for young adults have often been censored or challenged by would-be censors. Mr. Zindel responded by keeping track of the ideas of the people he calls the CensorKooks. For example, one woman in Pennsylvania wanted to censor the word green in all school textbooks. Why? Green is the color of the Devil. In Cincinnati, a man wanted all vowels to be censored from all library books. Why? “If you can’t say it, you can’t do it.” Mr. Zindel once heard a would-be censor on a talk show scream, “And what are they teaching in our schools? They are teaching ‘Catcher in the Rye’! ‘The Pigman’! And ‘Lord of the Flies’! — three of the filthiest books ever written!” The would-be censor might have been better able to present his case if he had actually read these books — or he might have decided that these books didn’t need to be censored.

 
Ex-girlfriend wants to keep his friends, but lose the dude Print E-mail
Written by Harlan Cohen   
Monday, 26 October 2009 09:37

Dear Harlan: How do you completely cut off from an ex-boyfriend when you have made friends with his friends? I dated this guy for more than a year. Cutting Off

 
Supernatural aspects of keyboards justify a big collection Print E-mail
Written by Dennis E. Powell   
Monday, 26 October 2009 08:26

My little scribbling this week comes to you from a 20-year-old, pristinely restored Northgate OmniKey keyboard.

Back when the crust of the Earth was cooling and computing was young, the Northgate company was one of many upstarts that made very good personal computers. What set them apart, though, were their keyboards. They had a pleasant, clicky feel that many users loved. Northgate sold their keyboards separately, but apparently few people then bought their computers, too, so they went out of business. This made having a Northgate keyboard even cooler.

 
What should I do about a suspicious girlfriend? Print E-mail
Written by Amy Alkon   
Thursday, 22 October 2009 09:53

My girlfriend snooped through my belongings and e-mail and even searched web forums for my comments. I feel terribly violated. I'm 29, she's 37, and we've been together for two years. I've never given her any reason to distrust me, but because we've only been having sex once a month as of recently, she assumes I'm cheating. Well, both of my parents died six months ago (both were terminally ill), and I couldn't care less about sex. Before they died, I took a six-month leave of absence and moved across the country to care for them, and my girlfriend quit her job and came with me. Since we returned, she's been unable to find a job or rebuild her social life. I get that she's unhappy, but she keeps bringing up her suspicion, and I keep explaining that I'm not cheating; I'm in deep mourning. I just don't know how I can ever trust her again, let alone respect her. — Laid Flat

 
Smiling shouldn't take this much work Print E-mail
Written by Harlan Cohen   
Monday, 19 October 2009 09:32

Dear Harlan: I don't understand if I'm just worn out or tired, but I am never happy. I feel as if there is nothing to look forward to. Sure, I hang out with my friends and have fun once in a while. But those kinds of things just temporarily lighten my mood. I've been like this since high school, but I tend to just smile it out. There are times when I'm really happy, but those fleeting moments are always followed by a crash. It's not that I'm bored, and there is really nothing missing in my life. I just feel worn out. Every day I wake up hoping I don't have to exert myself or do much of anything. My friends don't really think anything of it. My parents sometimes ask me what's wrong, but I brush it off. I really don't understand it myself. Sometimes I'm perfectly fine, and then other times I'm just down. It's getting to be a real problem now, though, because being in college, I have tons of work to do. But I have no motivation whatsoever to get it done. I get it done and do get good grades but only because I do need to get somewhere in life. I have no motivation to be anything either, such as a doctor, lawyer, teacher, etc. I just don't care anymore. I shouldn't be thinking this way. There was a time when I used to have a drinking problem, but my friends made me stop. Now I stay away from all of that altogether. If you ever see me, I look like a perfectly normal and happy person, but honestly, I try so hard to cover myself up. Sometimes, I don't even bother. I really want to be normal again.Barely Moving

 
Wise Up (10-19-09) Print E-mail
Written by David Bruce   
Monday, 19 October 2009 09:24

Good Deeds

• On Sept. 11, 2001, terrorists attacked the World Trade Center in New York City. Very few survivors were found after the towers fell. However, a former Marine named Dave Karnes and a Marine named Sgt. Thomas (his other name is not known) found two survivors buried in the rubble: Port Authority police officers Will Jimeno and Sgt. John McLoughlin. Mr. Karnes was an accountant working for Deloitte Touche in Wilton, Connecticut. When he heard about the attack on the World Trade Center, he got a military haircut, put on an old uniform, loaded his car with gear, and drove to the site. Police saw his uniform and his gear and waved him on to the site, where he met Sgt. Thomas and together they started searching the rubble.

 
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